Unstoppable

"I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over fifty, and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode! I think it was called, 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down.'" Homer Simpson.
Unstoppable is inspired by a true story about a train that wouldn't slow down. Granted, it didn't have a bomb attached to it by a psychopathic Dennis Hopper, but it did have enough chemicals in its freight to have the same effect on whatever it ran into.
Train-movie enthusiast Tony Scott (The Taking Of Pelham 1-2-3) teams up with his favourite leading man Denzel Washington (of the same flick) in a film written by screenwriter Mark Bomback (Die Hard 4.0).
So, if a train was travelling north at 100 kilometres an hour, and another train was travelling... I sucked at math.
It's train-ing day...
Young engineer Will (Chris Pine - Star Trek) is having a bad first day at his new job; his train trainer Frank (Washington) seems a bit grumpy at first while he's showing Will the ropes but the two soon bond.
My Name Is Earl's brother Ethan Suplee plays Dewey; an OH&S officer's worst nightmare. Dewey gets out of his train to flip a switch on the track then, not surprisingly, can't get back in to the train. In full throttle, the un-manned train 777 hurtles down the track toward an unsuspecting carriage full of kids on an excursion.
Worst. Field. Trip. Ever.
777 passes the kids and is now unstoppable (dun dun duuunnnn). Attempts to slow it down by using another train and a dude lowered from a helicopter fail.
Did they think to use a stuntman? I wonder.
Guided by yardmaster Connie (Rosario Dawson - Seven Pounds), it's up to Will and Frank and their trusty engine 1206 to try and stop the train before it ploughs into a highly populated area and spilling its toxic load.
If anyone can save the day its Denzel and the Captain of the frikken Enterprise!
Scott sure does know how to put you on the edge of your seat, even if it does only last a few moments at a time. There are a few lulls, usually filled in by Connie battling the wanker owners of the trains who just care about their money (how cliche) and Frank and Wills' personal stories about their respectively estranged kids/wife. It must be due to my cold, black heart but I bloody hate faff in my action flicks. That sick kid in the hospital in The Day After Tomorrow made me want to throw things at him. I don't care about making an emotional connection with someone who is about to make shit go boom. Just gimme the boom!! Sometimes it works, Die Hard is a great example, but that is a rare example.
I always want to know what happens to the reunited couple a few months after the heroic event. Do things go back to normal? Will our hero have to save the day again the next time she leaves him? Hmmph.
Scott used helicopters and 'news footage' well throughout the film, there can't be that many camera angles you can use to shoot a train so there was a fear of being stuck with a few overly-rotated shots. I didn't even mind the occasional shaky-cam that makes me want to curse Paul Greengrass's name whenever I see it.
Overall, it was a fun ride and an interesting look at a real life event through Hollywood's dramatised eyes.
Things I learnt: all first days and last days at jobs are the worst; always carry gaffer tape; big-wig corporate types are always douchebags.
Cue Soul Asylum...
Seven out of ten.